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Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Just a random working day.


As I work at a five minute walk from home, my working hours starts at 7:00 am ( I chose this shift to be able to reach earlier in the evenings ). Till 9:00 am, hubby takes care of the toddler. The child would be sleeping, so you can guess the amount of work that goes into it ;-) . Jokes apart, he does wake him up on time, gives him a bath, dresses him up (in the most obnoxious tee shirt and shorts combination which I later have to replace) and gets him ready for his playschool. I visit home for breakfast soon after and one day I found the house incredibly peaceful. No TV, no screams of the toddler. Occasional cute giggles of the toddler were coming from my room, and hubby humming a random tune was emanating from another. Something was terribly wrong.

I proceeded to my room and realized that my worst fear was happening. My toddler had caught hold of my ipad, and was playing Angry Birds in it. He had wanted to touch my ipad ever since I owned it, but by words and actions I had made it clear that it was not a toy. 
Don’t judge me, I cannot afford to buy ipads and give them to my toddler to play.  But he was so happily playing that I stormed to the bedroom where hubby was ironing his shirt.

“Dint you see that he is playing with my ipad ? With music on?”

“Yes . I gave it to him. See how cheerful he is! Awww”

“WHAT ! It is not a toy! Why dont you give your ipad instead?”

“WHAT? My ipad? I paid for that through my nose!”

“Then what about my ipad? We dint steal it ! We paid for that too !”

“But that is YOUR ipad no? Its okay” he said.

I mean what is the logic of that. My ipad is a toy. His ipad contains high security political information of the country’s Armed Forces.

I left the room fuming and snatched the ipad away from the toddler and replaced it with something else. This cant be happening. Do I look or behave like a cartoon to be treated like this. How can all my stuff be considered as toys. Hmph.

So we started from home, and the kiddo was dropped at playschool, and after he waved goodbye, I waited some more time watching him play with his girlfriend (who comes to playschool in a Hummer and I am not complaining )during which he gave me a look which translates roughly to ‘Please leave!’ On our way back I casually told hubby how the summer was catching up. I missed my sunglasses which were resting comfortably in some dark corner of hubby’s home in Cochin – I left it there last Christmas. I sighed aloud.

“Yes for your forgetful behavior, you should feel some sun this time, so that next time you won’t forget” preached the hubby. “Before misplacing this, you lost another one, remember?” he added.

“Whoa! You lost one too ! This is your second!” I argued.

“ Mine was stolen” he defended himself. “But yours was not, it is there somewhere but you don’t know” he said.

“Mine was stolen too!!!”

“No your sunglass just went missing it wasn’t stolen” he insisted.

“Oh I see? Did you see somebody stealing yours? It also went missing right?”

Silence.

"Your sunglass went missing, and you believe it was stolen. Mine is missing too, and I believe it was stolen as well."

“FINE”.

Silence ruled the car for some time, and I decided to break it. I thought of ways to change the topic and the mood and came up with a mind blowing one.


“You know, Ray Ban aviators are cool.”


I am really bad at changing topics.


Saturday, April 13, 2013

Ten Commandments of the seemingly underprivileged!


As I opened this document to write, I was completely blank. Where did all the topics go? I mean I sacked a lot of them just because it may 'unknowingly' refer to some readers ;-) But thanks to Facebook and Whatsapp, I am well connected to everybody at the meager cost of broadband internet. If it were not for internet, would we reach out for our landlines to talk to our friends we interact with everyday on Facebook? No, not in a thousand years. 

Today, I am going to highlight some of the weirdest misers I have heard about and others, I have personally encountered. I am sure this will ring a bell somewhere as you read, because chances are more that you have come across one. 
To save money, and how!

1.Thou shalt not make phone calls
Local, STD, any calls. 
They do not even use the 100 free local calls facility available in the landline hoping that it will be en-cashed one day and it can be used to fund that square plot near Infopark. But when someone else calls them, the caller is not spared for a good hour with the most mind-numbing conversation, ever.

2.Thou shall miscalculate on purpose.
When a group of six friends buy similar dresses to wear on graduation day, the total amount Rs.6500 is divided by 5 and each one has to pay Rs1300, says this little devil. When you dig deep into the bill and ask her, the perpetually shrewd friend admits having made a 'small mistake'. But you know it wasn't, even though you have to pretend otherwise.

3.Thou shall not go on vacations
They do not plan nor do they participate in any group excursions simply because pitching in the total expense can be avoided by sitting idle in the comforts of one’s own home. There are others who actually come and have fun but play evil procrastinators when it comes to money.

4.Thou shall attend all parties but never host one. These weirdos can be found in corporate corridors and are as common as dirt. When there is a birthday or anniversary of any kind, they will be the first ones to initiate a treat or demand a party. However in all the years you know them, their birthday remains a mystery or there are enough reasons to embarrass the ones who ask for it.


5.Thou shall not buy anything new. 
These are people who were born to use second hand items. In all their lifetime they do not have a concept of a new car or a phone. It has to be second hand or Chinese make and they are fulfilled to their heart's content. 

6.Thou shall act innocent. 
These are our friends who consistently forget their purses or cards and reveal the same when the bill arrives. Someone covers for them at the moment, and it is forgotten. Dignified corporate friends find it cheap to remind their forgetful friend about the 200 rupees from 'last week's party'  and thus ignore it. Mission accomplished.

7.Thou shall car pool. 
Car pooling could have been introduced to save the environment but this was a blessing for many cheapos who keep their precious machines under covers in the garage. You always have that guy who tells you where he needs to be picked and dropped in a team outing.

8.Thou shall criticize.
These are the same people who own acres of land and runs highly successful family businesses but act very modest. When the comparatively poor you save for a million years and afford to buy a new phone they criticize you of being very rich and extravagant. In most cases these people use mobile phones which have black and white displays.

9.Thou shall eat free lunches. 
These are the ones, who suggest getting together for lunch when it is not on your schedule. They persuade and suggest a restaurant, eat lavishly, burp and pass on the bill to you as if you are his single parent.

10.Thou shall calculate. These are the ones, whose outing day summary looks like this on their phones: 
Public Toilet – Rs.1 
Bisleri Rs.15.75 (when that 16.75 has gone from his wallet). 
However when you pay Rs.1200 at KFC it is not counted but instantly overlooked.


 Tell me, have you met any one of these annoying creatures ?

Monday, April 1, 2013

Caption Contest Results !

When I started the caption contest on my blog I had no idea that so many contestants would actually participate in it ! And lot of others who wished me on my Blog Anniversary... seriously guys..it was overwhelming. Anyway, I passed on all the entries to Papa, who by the way has read over 200 books and always has some by the bedside and at his study table. Well the genre of books he reads is something like a facebook relationship status - 'It's complicated'. It cannot be understood by mediocre brains like mine, so I never really interfere or borrow books from him. I am not a fan of philosophy also ;-) However he was happy to go through all the entries and gave me his top three favorite captions, and logically the first one is the winner, who will win a Rs.200 gift voucher for her next purchase from Flipkart!

And the winner is...
is..




is..


Preeti Dhingra !!! Congratulations !!! Here is to you!

Her prize winning caption was.. " Let me fly before I sink."

Papa also liked the below captions, which he thinks are worth a mention. Unfortunately I have no gifts to give them. Sorrie :-( But thanks a ton !

Flight for existence and a search for sustenance !  - Antony Fernandez

A bird learns to fish not because of talent, but because of hunger  - Karthikeyan Ravikumar

You can see the contest details here. 


So how was Easter, folks? Mine was good....ate a lot of food until the button of my dress around the tummy burst and landed into one of the curries. We had Appam and Beef stew for breakfast - authentic recipe followed through ISD call from the MIL ! There are no free recipes, people, just like there is no free lunch. 

 I have taken a pic of the stew (just in case you are hungry right now :D )


Wednesday, March 27, 2013

First day at Playschool : excerpts from an anxious Mom's diary.


Every Mom dreads that day. The day their little one goes to a daycare for the very first time.

Mine was no different; given that anxiety is my middle name. Thanks to my parents who abundantly bestowed the most exquisite gene pool to me, anxiety and tension being the two most prominent traits. 

My baby was at home from birth until he turned 20 months old, and I was at a stone’s throw at office visiting him at regular intervals and a housemaid managing him when I was not there. My mother visited a couple of times too, and things were going smoothly until one day, my maid got enlightened from the other world. She decided to play hard-to-get, increased her wages, and started being irregular for lame reasons. This was unacceptable and we started thinking seriously and browsing aggressively for good daycare centers.

And we landed one.

So my next step was… to get anxious. I started chatting with all Moms I have on my chat list asking them what was the ripe age to go to playgroup. Given that my kiddo gets hyperactive around other kids his age was a sure sign that a forty year old housemaid is no company to him. Many of my friends were happy to help me get myself together over an endless list of queries and worries I had. I got a sense of reassurance from them. I visited the daycare center a few times, and shed some tears while talking to the teacher in charge because I am an emotional mess most of the time i.e whenever I am not sleeping.  I ensured the daycare was certified, made careful observation about cleanliness, the children to teacher ratio and most importantly how engaged the kids appeared whenever I visited. I noticed that none of the kids including babies were crying and they all were engrossed in something or the other, as the big bright room had enough toys and stationery to keep tiny tots busy for a long time. This boosted my confidence a little bit. I must tell you, I’d been at the crossroads of life many times and in do-or-die situations (read examinations) too, but I've never been through such emotional stress, ever.

As weekend falls on Thursday and Friday in this part of the world, Saturday was the first day of the week. Then came Saturday, February 23rd 2013.

Before that, I will let you guys peep into how February 22nd went. Complete disillusionment. Yes we went out to buy lunch and snack boxes for him, during which I was still in a state of complete delusion. I did not sleep that night. My mind wandered around his playschool and I pictured him in the worst scenarios. I was not helping myself in the belief and faith part of prayer. Soon my alarm went off, and I realized that nights are very short when you are preoccupied. Nights are also short on examination eves, but that is a different story.
So on that day, I woke up at 5:00 a.m, that’s when my working day starts. The kitchen schedules were completely reoriented to pack his lunch, thus pushing our breakfast into a second priority. Diapers, dresses, napkins, lunch, snacks, milk, water – Check. Around 9:00 am, we left from home. My hands were sweating like crazy, while my son was humming away a random tune.

Soon we reached the nursery and were welcomed by smiling teachers and a lot of kids of different age groups and nationalities. The bigger kids had assembled there before going to their classrooms. As they left the play area seemed bigger and brighter with all sorts of toys and little rides. Four other toddlers almost the same age as him stood there playing among themselves. When he saw the big bright room, he struggled himself out of my hands and walked towards the toys. He got into one of the rides, and turned and smiled at me. I stood there for a while, and he occasionally turned to look at me, not knowing that I will not be there for long. I fought back tears. Seeing my constipated expression, my husband intervened and asked.. “So you think the parents of those kids dumped them here because they don’t like them?”

“No..”

“Then what? See how happy he is now. He may miss us, but this is where he wants to be during the day. Not at home watching those useless serials with the housemaid”.

Okay that went above my head, and the teacher consoled me that he will be fine and that they were all there for him. She also told me not to stay there looking at him too long.
I slowly left, with a heavy heart, wiping tears. I also called up the nursery like ten times and they said that he was not crying. However the nursery being a new place for him, he did not sleep on the first day.

I picked him up in the evening, and he was little tired but still smiling. He came home and caught up on sleep.

The days after, for around two weeks, he cried when we dropped him, and clung to me refusing to go. This literally broke my heart and I cried excessively on my way back to office every single day. I wailed, hyperventilated and became the loudest drama queen ever in the history of motherhood. Not to mention the levels of productivity at office on those days.

It is his fourth week at playschool now, and my prayers have been answered. Since last week he looks forward to go ,  has made new friends, sleeps and eats on time and is happy by the grace of the Almighty. The day has come that I can wave to a happy face when I drop him in the morning. The day I was praying so badly for, is finally here. That smile, and the way he waves at me is directly proportional to my sanity and presence of mind that day.

This is for all the mothers, working or not, who dreads a nursery or a playgroup and cannot imagine sending their precious child to one. I assure you, from experience, kids always love to be around other kids than with us. 

Spread the word!