Sunday, June 9, 2013

Our new, extended family !

So basically there are four people in our house. Hubby, toddler, myself and the TV.

Because, when the new TV arrived over a month ago, I was told that it had the ability to listen and obey (unlike the others in the house) and hence it will be considered as a person, and treated like a new born (like other gadgets and cables and wires and the dust sitting on them).


This new age television was obviously bought on an EMI scheme, because hello, we do not believe in selling kidneys to buy television sets. So coming to the TV, it is sleek and huge. It has got a remote control, but as they say, remote controls are hard to find and getting up every time to get a hold on it may even result in drastic consequences like movement of bones and loss of calories. So the television makers have eased our lives and increased our risks of obesity and heart disease by enabling the voice recognition software. So we just sit on the couch and say, ‘Hi TV, Power on’, or ‘Hi TV, power off’. 

Mind-blowing :D 

And when you raise your hand by just sitting on the couch, the television instantly brings the volume controls and we can adjust it there itself. This is not an excellent feature for people like me, because if I raise my hand to scratch my head, all the volume controls appear and I have two pairs of eyes rolling at me. I mean- to use hi-fi televisions like these, one should be well groomed . The TV does not entertain people with dandruff watching it.

Then of course it allows you to watch 3D. Like on weekends you have bloody  eyeballs from Final Destination3 rolling into your lap or the T-Rex eating your brain.

Now the good news is, that was also the first sentence my toddler said. Hi, TV power on. Praise the Lord, he talked to the TV first! I was moved to tears . Thankfully, the TV does not obey him because of course TV is TV and it doesn't understand baby language. (Neither do we).

But believe me the clarity is like a dream. Then of course it helps indirect means of communication. Like when there are  lots of chores pending for the weekend, and everybody else act like they are completely oblivious to it and place themselves on the couch, saying 'Hi Tv, power on', and from the kitchen I go 'Hi TV, get lost'. 
Hey, I do not disrespect anyone; I am talking to the TV! But a hint is taken ;-).Am I smart or what.

And if we talk aloud, the TV thinks that we are talking to it and brings a small bubble on the bottom of the screen which reads ‘Is it noisy around you?’ and ‘Try saying that again’ and then I want to yell…hey we have life going on here, so please! And to that usually it takes a Manmohan Singh stand. Somewhere inside a maze of wires and capacitors, it might be saying to itself ‘Theek Hai’.

Oh I almost forgot, I will soon be inviting you guys for the official christening ceremony. ;-) Of course it will carry a surname, and you know what that will be :D



24 comments:

  1. Son of a TV! The couch potato in me wants to rush to your home and talk to the TV right away! :D
    Give my love to the newest addition to the family. :)

    PS: So when can I come over? ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anytime, Blunt! I am more than happy you've atleast visited my blog !

      Delete
  2. woah... cool :) You have a Tv that obeys commands !! Thats more than my dog does... or I do, for that matter :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Correct ! Atleast the TV obeys..or atleast...listens!

      Delete
  3. Haha.. such a cool post! All these inventions are by men... who obey commands at work and at home. Then they come and slouch on the couch just so they can say 'Hi TV power on'!!
    More power to us women who care zilch about these commands ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Right ! I cant stand the sight of him being too lazy to even stand up and find the remote ! God knows what all they will automate in future :D

      Delete
  4. wow the TV that obeys your commands is too cool . Can you change channels too by voice? The other day , I heard my colleague talking to herself in her cubicle "Call so and so ". "Find a Chinese Restaurant " etc. First I thought she was talking to her deaf 90 year old grand ma or something . Then I wondered if she 'd gone over the edge. But it turned out she was talking to SIRI trying to get it to obey her commands.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha I know..! Siri is funny when people actually use it :D Ya the TV brings the channel and volume controls when we raise the hands sitting on the couch!

      Delete
  5. Smart TV :D Every couch potato's dream come true. Lucky you!
    The satisfaction of having someone to listen to your commands! I want this TV now :D :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Err.. actually I still use the remote. The TV understands only if we say the commands in a fake accent :-/

      Delete
  6. Ha, ha...enjoyed your post on the new member in your family. And to think of a christening ceremony... :) I don't think I'm ready for such a TV yet, can't handle the kids using remote itself, and with voice control, there would be too many people in the couch with their hands up!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL !! and the TV will crash because it was driven to nuts with all the chaos and confusion ! LOL :D

      Delete
  7. Haha, hubby and me are just about to pick a TV for our room. This post definitely came handy :D

    Say hello to Mr. TV for me :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sure, I will. hahaha... buy the Samsung LED 3D... and you can write a post about the new addition to your family as well !

      Delete
  8. hahahahahahaha seriously those were your toddlers first words?????
    Hhahaha welcome to the new addition indeed!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. :D Thank You... I now feel like I had another baby :D

      Delete
  9. hey nice post ya...and thanks:)

    ReplyDelete
  10. This is ROFL post! Had me in splits.

    ReplyDelete
  11. haha true .I saw this TV called as Smart TV which an be named as a robot (as for u person) too.
    Hope you are having lots of fun :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes we are. Thanks for your comment and welcome to this space. :-)

      Delete