Wednesday, June 18, 2014

A bad hair (wedding) day.

I have not been to a lot of weddings outside Kerala, but I envy them. 
Whenever I tune into some Hindi wedding song I see all those impeccably ornamented, good looking , happy families, full of youngsters. An average looking baby born into such a family could suffer from some serious inferiority complex. And there are like fifty people in the 20 to 25 age bracket which is not logical, this being one among a lot of other things. For example the wedding in the movie 'Yeh Jawani Hai Deewani' (where there were no adults anywhere in the scene) is so awe inspiring. All along it is like- who wants adults at a wedding they are old, they can’t eat cake. Somewhere some super rich Dad was paying astronomical bills and was not invited to what he was paying for. The bride gets to choose her designer and her hair done in the most exquisite style and eventually ends up looking like a …a….err… Bollywood actress:-/ (Well, what else)

Talking about hair, I am sure there must be some great tradition behind the updo hairstyles for Christian brides. Christian weddings in Kerala- I’ve been dragged to a lot of them – and willingly went to a few. And this hair updo undoubtedly is one of the greatest traditions that no one ever dared to defy. Other smaller, insignificant traditions like marrying someone from the same religion or caste or age group were reformed ages ago.

The bride, who is usually a woman who has never appeared in an updo in public view before, does so on the biggest day of her life. Other days she did updos were at home, when there was load shedding. You cannot really call that an updo…it is something like a temporary (and futile) way of tying up the hair to keep it away from the face and neck because of increased perspiration.

I have always wondered why a comfortable and tried-and-tested hairdo cannot suffice on a wedding day. A bridal updo is considered to be very sophisticated and its origin dates back to the days of Adam and Eve. The bride has no choice but to submit herself to the hands of the experienced hairdresser (who does the obvious which she has been doing since decades now she can do it even in her sleep). Even though the day hugely belongs to the bride, her choices are comparable to the likes of white mice at the laboratory. Only the angle of elevation of the updo differs, and organza flowers on the updo replaced the traditional pearls, but the stylists are completely oblivious of the fact that no one really cares.

However I have noticed that a lot of pretty women end up looking like someone they are not. The hair, the comfortable partition that defined the shape of the face and everything that looked good on a woman is changed for worse. Yes some brides did look much more beautiful than usual, but most commonly it so happens otherwise. The updo for one is tried for the first time, the off white saree spells simplicity and hence the makeup needs to be tastefully done- but I have been witness to beautiful women who became quite unrecognizable.

Wedding rehearsals are still not very common yet. Why not someone just go ahead and let the hair loose if she is most comfortable and pretty in it? You can always trust hairpins to keep hair away from the face. A simple and uncomplicated tiara to complement that can look like a fine hairdo! Look at her- I am not saying that this is an uncomplicated tiara, but the hairdo is pretty simple.



Ban updos. They are not for us. Let’s admit it, updos can look sophisticated with gowns on some women but with sarees …I don’t know, they just rarely look good. Sarees and updos are so familiar to us; we see it every other day that we have ceased to see beyond it. With time we are just improving it but we did not replace it with what suits us best.

I had an updo put up at the back of my head on my wedding, and disliked it to my very core. I wished I could pluck it and throw it away. I had never done an updo before that, ever. And I got a terrible headache with hair pulled up so much that its strength was tested (so was my patience). There were as many hair pins as there were people at my wedding and I ended up looking like someone I was not. And you know what? I cannot go back to that day and do it better!

It is so ridiculous I had the guts to choose my life partner but not my hairstyle.

Image Courtesy:Google Images.

18 comments:

  1. I hear you sistah!! I hated everything about my wedding too, apart from the guy I chose to marry.

    The hairstyle, makeup, sarees and what not. I did not even look like myself that day. Plus, the family decided to call 3500+ guests, so you can imagine the turmoil I went through. I had to smile and pose million times while my head was throbbing thanks to all the pins piercing my skull.

    I'm tempted to get married again, to the same man, just so that I can do it my way!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly. And if I had that second chance I'd wear a gown and let my hair loose. Nothing else would change.

      Delete
  2. Hahaha... Most updos do tend to make the brides pretty old. When it comes to Kerala, most of us have the right to choose grooms but not a hair style that suits us! Loved it. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Correct! Updos add like five years to the age as well... I completely missed that point! Thank you!

      Delete
  3. " Other smaller insignificant traditions like marrying someone from the same religion or caste or age group were reformed ages ago"- :) :)
    Good, Papa

    ReplyDelete
  4. SORRY...I am going to point at you and laugh. KHI KHI KHI..Actually I know the joke is one me because a year or two and I will be getting myself an ugly updo :(
    Last month I went to the wedding of a relative and I held the emergency light and she got her makeup done by some local beautician who had bushy arms.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Beautician with bushy arms ! LOL ! :D
      You laugh now. I will laugh later !!

      Delete
  5. well...what to say, mine was one where I ended up looking like a kuchipudi dancer on 'arangettam' day....sigh.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fate ! Thats all I can say, Amogha ! I looked horrible !

      Delete
  6. If for Christians, it is the updo , the center partition and jasmine flowers are the nemesis of a Hindu Bridal make up.I part my hair sideways and have bangs on one side , but for my wedding they just flattened the whole thing after doing a center partition and made me look ridiculous. For my engament , I had my own way and put my hair loose with a few hair slides keeping my hair from my face and I still like to see those pictures. But not my wedding ones. :( . Why does the Bride have no choice on the hair do...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sunitha -Exactly what happens to most women including me ! After the wedding mostly the woman wont get to have her way, so wedding day is like the last day of freedom ...we should be allowed to do what we want on our hair !! We should all raise awareness and support this cause !

      Delete
    2. Sunitha just said what I was going to. What updo? Our style is, mudi azhichittaal thaazhe kidakkum :D

      Delete
  7. I had short hair. So, when I went to the salon for my 'bridal makeup', I asked them for a blowdry and keep the makeup minimal. Guess what the salon lady asked me? Are you Christian!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Wow. Thank you for speaking my mind. I have always believed that the wedding updos done in India make us look dull, boring and old. I got wedded twice (with the same guy, of course :D). I had to marry in India and in France as my husband is French. I had decided that I will not do any updo, but on the day, family, friends and the parlor lady manupilated me in to doing an updo and I did. Still stuck to a simple one. In France, I wore the gown and I was the decision maker, so I just did a half pin up with few bobby pins which had small tiny lily flowers in it, just to make it look a little weddingy. It was still a challenge for me, as I've been a tomb boy my whole life.
    Anyway, I blabber a lot. Your blog is lovely and the posts are addictive. Following you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much Dhara...! And welcome here :-) See you around !

      Delete