Thursday, July 16, 2009

I.T woes :(

Have you come across formally dressed people carrying square shaped bags and a belt err tag around their necks,a woebegone expression, forever engrossed in conversations on their bluetooth devices which sounds more or less like, 'Yeah the con call is fixed at 5:00 pm.' ... 'Yeah I'll take care of the presentation'..'I'll do that...' 'Yes, we are working on Saturday..'
These are typical techie conversations.These guys almost drive the nation, and are nothing more than high-level-programmed robots, who has eventually forgotten to smile. Some conversations in their day-to-day lives goes like this.

Husband is onsite. Wife is trying to chat with him on Yahoo messenger.
He: Ok, so bye for now. I have to prepare dinner.
She: I just started talking…I have so much more to say..
He: So you are saying that I should go to bed on an empty stomach after a tiresome day at office?
She: *expressions of despair* Hmm… I will prepare dinner for you. I just learnt how to make omelets.
He: You gonna take it up as ‘remote support’?

Mom of a techie had a sprain on her ankles. She had taken a week off and is on self imposed bed rest.
Mom: Hellooo…did u reach office? Did u have breakfast? Did he go to office too? What did you cook for lunch? Is that dress I sent you fitting you properly? Did you call your in-laws? How is his work?
Techie (diplomatically ignores all questions): Tell me fast what is the ‘current status’ of the pain on your leg? Any ‘issue’ ?

He is sleeping overtime on a week day, and she tries to wake him up. After a few minutes,of consistent shaking and poking, he responds.
‘Key in username and password’.

At never-ending annoying queues of the cash counter in a super market.
She: Why cant this guy buy lesser items? Why does he need 3 packets of tea powder anyways? Why don’t they enhance this by having more sales guys and counters?
He:‘ You’re right. It is a 'high priority issue’

Auto driver : ‘ madam Mere paas balance dene ke liye 2 rupya nahin hai’
Techie: “No issues”.

A techie friend on phone: “ Did you know about that new movie? SRK is the villain as well as the hero. He is a…... ‘global variable’.

Techie to the maid: Pick her from school, and bathe her first. Keep an eye on her always, and make sure she finishes her homework. If she asks for me, tell her that I will come home early today, by 11 pm.Else, if she asks for her dad, convince her tactfully that he is spending the night at office.Else if she asks for food, prepare her favorite dosa with ghee in it. END IF.


  1. I remember joining my 1st company 5 years back.. went to the HR and said that I need more time to get reference letters.. He said "no issues"... within a week I realised that was the most used (rather misused) term around..

  2. @ Anup :He he.. 'no issues' has become a phrase now, isnt it ? ;-)Thanx 4 droppin by :)

  3. Yeah... its become kind of sick now..
    btw I'm a frequent visitor... the post on shopping with ur dad/mom was the best...especially the part where ur dad tells ur mom abt the grl who asked if he was ur brother... hehe...

    liked the bagyadevatha one as well...

    keep writing :-)

  4. Wow! Thanks a ton, Anup! That was a lot of encouragement!