Friday, February 19, 2010

Workstation Grievances :-(

So I am in another facility of my firm for the past three weeks.

Day one, I am just roaming around cafeterias of different buildings trying to find which cafeteria is best for pop corn.
Day two, I have a workstation configured with all client connectivity, outlook and office communicator, and a desk phone.
So in the open cubicle next to mine, I noticed a lady, around 35, coughing.    Unstoppably.

Days passed.

The cough doesn’t stop. Not even once did she bother to cover or use a towel. She just opens her mouth, coughs nauseatingly into the air. And sometimes into her laptop, mobile or desk phone. Now this lady is a manager, very annoyingly loud and rude to her subordinates. So now it is clear why people don’t react.

As Papa and Mummy would be in their respective workplaces, I call them separately during office hours.
Me: Hello Papa..
*cough* *cough*
Papa: What happened Anu? Why are you coughing?
Me: Its not me Papa, just a lady who happen to sit near me.
Papa: And she sits so close to you? Stay away from her!!
Me: So what else… how is work going on?
*cough* *cough*
Papa: You should actually tell her to cover during cough.
Me: So did u both go to see Ammamma yesterday? How is she doing?
*cough* *cough*
Papa: What the hell? How can people behave so irrationally? She is spraying germs into your mouth!
Me: I hear Ammamma is not doing so great. Why dint you bring her home until she recovers?
*cough* *cough*
Papa: You buy her a towel! I will pay you for that!
Me: Okay, bye. *SLAM*

After a few days.

Me: Hi in college now?
*cough* *cough*
Mummy: Dint that sicko recover from that damn cough?
Me: So when are you coming to Bangalore next?
*cough* *cough*
Mummy: How much common sense is required for someone to use a tissue or towel while coughing?
Me: Better come during summer. Bangalore is pleasant in summer compared to Trivandrum.
*cough* *cough*
Mummy: You have such a big mouth for everything else. Why haven’t you told her about the matter?
Me: For God’s sakes , she is a Manager!!
*cough* *cough*
Mummy :[at the peak of her volume]:  How does it matter whether she is a manager or a sweeper!!!!!!!

Sensing a potential threat to my job, I cut that call.

The following week, I suffer from unbearable tooth ache. I update this on facebook and twitter, and people come and console me saying ,’ dear, this is why I say, that you need to brush your teeth’. Haha, very funny.
I even take a leave and stay home due to the pain. The phone rings.

Mummy: Hello Anu..
Me: Hii Mummy..!
Mummy: How is that coughing manager doing?
Me: !!!!!!!!!!$#@#$#%^$^%&^*(&)(
Mummy: How am I supposed to know that you have tooth ache!
Me: You should first ask how I am doing !


  1. You could buy manager some cough drops and leave them on her desk or chair - anonymously of course. Or you could start coughing really loud while turning in her direction – no mouth covered would be mandatory. Of course that runs the danger of increased illness both with straining your vocals and deep breathing in mangers sickness.
    Good Luck with this one.

  2. lol...n your mom asked about the "cougher" first? buhahahaha :D

    n i actually agree with what grayquill said...try it! if it works, cool...if it doesn't, even more cool...u can blog about it! (yeah i know we readers are a selfish lot!) :P

  3. hahhahaha.. the corporate tale of woes..but hilariously done..

    hope the tooth pain is better now.. know her birthday or anniversary or her anniversary of joining the company or her pet's birthday.some occasion to gift her a fancy handkerchief set.

  4. @Grayquill: Yes actually I thought of that too. But this person seems to be dumb enough not to realize the point.

    @Blunt Edges: Laugh, laugh.*sob*

    @Meenakshi: Sounds hilarious, but terribly annoying in reality. And reg her pet's bday.. tht pet must be dead by now.:D
    Thanks, dear!

  5. lol...cough cough... n now this is because I'm ROFL!!! :D

    hey,, before she logs in everyday,, keep a tissue with a note,, EVERYDAY,,,
    n lets see if the managers still have the ability to take hints or to understand :D

    before you slam!!! howz ur tooth ache!!?

  6. Darn I wrote a comment and my system rebooted.
    Just sayign you are getting better everyday! Write more humour more often

  7. How come i missed this post!!! occasionally cough the way she does, that too when ur standing close to her!!may be she'll understand ;)

  8. Ya even I was thinking how u missed it. Anyways.. hmmm... whatever I wrote in this one is true between the lines...:(

  9. LOL....had a good laugh;-D. I sooooo can imagine ur parents going on and on about it;-D

    Toothaches are bad news. Hope u showed it:-)!!!!

  10. hihi... yes even now they do :-) I have to actually take my mobile , swipe and run outside when they call me at office... No exaggeration here :(
    Thanks a ton for dropping me a comment. I am honoured. I just LOVE ur blog.

  11. Hey how is your tooth ache now? It is real fun to read about the FB msgs. BTW are you brushing regularly now? Hey I’m not serious :) ....(**looking up with eyes wide open wishing anitha doesnot slam her laptop**)
    Look the good ME asked about you first. And I’m not going to say anything about that coughing manager. I see you got very good and funny advices on that issue...

  12. hahahahha yes..there were a lot of weird ideas...and I dint do anything...I am used to the noise and immmune to the germs. :D